brucekluger.com

    USA Today, August 16, 2007

    Hear Me Now
    Politicians are ‘on message’; kids are distracted; celebs live by their own
    rules. What do they all have in common? They’re not listening.

    By Bruce Kluger


    It's starting to make me paranoid. My children
    never seem to hear my first three requests to
    pick up their shoes. The telephone sales
    reps never seem to grasp that I don't want a
    subscription to TV Guide. And the Chicken
    Delight delivery guy never—ever
    remembers to bring the extra barbecue
    sauce.

    And don't get me started on my wife and the
    bathroom light.

    Is anybody listening?

    Tuning out the world has, of course, been an irksome quirk of humanity ever since
    Eve famously dissed the don't-handle-the-produce command. Yet I've always
    assumed that poor listening skills are simply a behavioral flaw that most of us can
    keep in check, like nail-biting or binging on Mallomars.

    But in her new book, The First Word: The Search for the Origins of Language,
    author Christine Kenneally suggests that the I-can't-hear-you phenomenon might
    be more deep-seated than your typical marital disconnect or misunderstanding at
    the dry cleaners. It could be anthropological.

    In recounting an experiment in which two apes, both versed in sign language, were
    thrown together and encouraged to chew the fat, Kenneally describes a surprising
    outcome: Rather than engage in a meaningful meeting of simian minds—a warm
    and fuzzy exchange about, say, the latest King Kong remake—the hairy pair
    immediately launched into an arm-waving row worthy of Ralph and Alice Kramden.

    "What resulted was a sign-shouting match," Kenneally writes. "Neither ape was
    willing to listen."

    If this monkey meltdown tells us something important about our capacity for
    listening—namely, that we're hard-wired to prefer the sound of our own voices to
    others'—it is also a blow to Darwin's theory. Because looking around the cultural
    landscape, it's obvious that, these days, we're tuning each other out more, not less.

    Take last month's CNN/YouTube Democratic presidential debate. Admittedly, this
    experiment in political discourse didn't exactly reflect well on the journalistic
    sophistication of the average American (one participant actually spoke through an
    action figure of Aquaman, for God's sake), but the freshness of the YouTubers'
    questions gave the candidates an opportunity to come off-script for a change.

    Too bad they didn't rise to the challenge. While the folks on screen candidly talked,
    laughed and even sang about their deeply personal concerns for the nation, the
    responses from behind the podia were largely canned excerpts from freeze-dried
    stump speeches—a juxtaposition that made the candidates' answers sound even
    flatter than usual.

    Not that the Democrats have a monopoly on deafness. After four-plus years of
    questionable listening, our president still clings to his calamitous war plan, even as
    a new UPI/Zogby Poll reveals that more than half the country no longer trusts his
    judgment as commander in chief. Add to this an administration that continues to
    snub congressional oversight, blow off the science community and plug its ears to
    the cries of frequent majorities (stem cells, anyone?), and it's safe to say that this
    White House has become positively Beethovian in its inability to hear the music.

    Sadly, politicians are hardly the only ones on aural shutdown. It's only August, and
    already this year we've been witness to an unprecedented parade of the listening-
    challenged—from the sudden spate of spoiled starlets who told the law to talk to the
    hand, then landed in hot water (or jail) as a result; to the juiced-up cyclists who
    somehow didn't hear the repeated rules about doping, then pedaled themselves
    right out of the Tour de France; to CNN's money-man-turned-gas-bag Lou Dobbs,
    who wouldn't know how to listen if you gave the guy a third ear.

    As we wade into a new election season, it's disheartening to imagine yet another
    campaign in which everyone's talking and no one gets heard. Then again, maybe
    one candidate will step forward and teach the rest how to listen. It's always possible,
    you know. After all, monkey see, monkey do.


    (Illustration by Web Bryant, USA TODAY)